What can I say, How do I put into words what my heart is feeling....Complete, Content, Loved, wanted....So many years have gone by, time we will never get back....but thats ok, because we found eachother and I will never loose him again. The day he was to pick me up from my Hotel, we walked past eachother a few times...than I looked and said " DADDY" he than turned around came my way and with tears in his eyes he held me....my dad , crying for me...weeping like a child in my arms ....my thoughts " he loves me " and thats all I needed...all tha I had rehearsed in my mind , all that I was going to say ....went away...for that was no longer important...this was a new start...and I had to let go Of the past , my anger...if I were to begin a future that was positive with this man.... On the way to his house , as he was driving he spoke of how he did not feel as he was deserving of this opportunity, but very greatful for it...tears would come down his face ....and I just found myself feeling sorry for this man, and for his suffering....I realized, that we both suffered....we both hurt and we both cried for not having eachother in our lives...I wiped his cheek with my hands and was so thankful to have these moments with him...for the first time in my life I had my Dad and it felt good.....His wife is such a beautiful women, she gave us our time , she knew what this time meant to both of us, and for that I am greatful.....
He would make me breakfast in bed.... We played Dominos and although he would never admit to it I beat him bad : ) I went to his church with him and was so proud of him as he spoke ....one point my dad told his members that he would speak in english for a few moments because he wanted me to truly understand what he was saying,,,, and with his Ricky Ricardo voice : ) he begged for my forgiveness and told me he loved me....as he spoke , tears flowed down my face and he cried as well...our eyes were locked on eachother and at that moment , all was forgiven......
What I have learned, Life is to short ....I did not want to get a phone call one day from someone saying that my Dad was no longer with us....I did not want to live my life with regrets....I have my Dad now....and life is good.....life is very good.....
Yo te amore me papa....I love YOU Dad
Carmen
3 comments:
I've been waiting to read your post to see how your reunion with your dad went, and I'm so happy that it went so well. You must feel like a weight has been lifted off your shoulders. All the best for you and your family.
I just re-read your post this Father's Day, and very glad that you have reconnected....! I hope the relationship continues to grow with your dad...Life is too short.....a Very happy (and one day late) Father's Day wish to Dante....Dante, you have set the bar HIGH for anniversaries now....!! I can just hear it now....'well, look at what Dante did for Carmen'....Thanks, buddy!!! Hope to see you guys soon......love, Bob, Tina, Zach and Bella
I'm crying at my desk at work! I'm so happy for you Carmen. Though I wouldn't say my story is even close to yours, I too had a distant relationship with my father when I was a teen, and only when I discovered I was pregnant with Nate, did we start to rebuild what had crumbled over the years before... so I understand your sentiment. Awesome! Looking forward to seeing you in a few weeks!
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